Investing in Relationships 101: Making an Effort

"We need to hang out."

*three weeks later*

"Hey, how have you been?" Let's get lunch soon."

*three weeks later*

"Long time no see. Let's catch up soon."

I'm sure most of you have had some type of variation of this conversation more than once in your life, whether it's with someone you used to be close friends with or a new friend that you run into occasionally in the hallway. Either way, making an effort may seem pretty self-explanatory, but a lot of people get wrapped up in their busy lives and forget to stay in touch with old friends or make time for new friends. Like I said before, my best friend Kayla and I grew up, made new relationships and got involved with different activities, but we never stopped making time for each other. Maybe it's because I didn't have any siblings to call up or have family nights with, but either way, whether it was dinner once a month or is now a visit to NYC once a year, it all counts.

Kayla and I during her visit in the fall of my Junior year of college

My other group of friends that I've had since middle school, who are also like sisters to me, also helped me realize how important it is to make an effort. The eight of us have a group text so we're usually in contact at least once a week. Many of them have come to NYC to visit me and whenever I go back home I'm always making plans with them like things are right where we left off.

Top photo: Summer before freshman year of college
Bottom photo:Winter break of junior year of college

My point is it would be easy to not talk as often and not make the effort to visit them or for them to spend the money to visit me, but those things are all part of investing in relationships. You can't expect your relationships to remain the same or grow stronger if you're not putting in the effort.

Not only is it crucial to make an effort with old friends, but you have to do the same with new friends, especially once you get to college and you're busier than you ever thought possible. This is even harder to do in a big city when it's easy to want to do what's simple and convenient for yourself and not take the subway all the way to Brooklyn just to get coffee with someone. But, you will most likely never regret taking the time out of your hectic day to catch up with a friend. I find that most of the time it is exactly what I needed. Your papers will get done and you'll eventually catch up on sleep, but you will never know what type of friendship you would be missing out on if you never make the effort to invest in them.